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♠ The Dango
JANE♥ Currently doing Pastry and Baking. First cried in 22nd Nov. I♥Apple tea. |
♠ Dango Buddies
Carin.Chen Hui. Joanna. Laura. PanLiang. QianYi. Renee. Tessa. WeiJian. |
♠ Dango Music
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♠ Dango Talk
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Thursday, March 22, 2012 ♠
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Disappointed with myself... I swear I wont want to organise Camp anymore... It didn't even met my criteria.. It's just a waste of every one's 3D2N precious time.. Come to think of it , it's really a waste of time... Wonder what have the cadets learnt throughout that 3D2N camp.. Does this camp taught them something valuable?? I often questioned myself.... " What have they actually learnt and gained from there ?? " Nothing... Really nothing... I wonder why they respect that 2 so much and not to me?? Is it because I was once their schoolmate and was this the reason why they can be rude to me?? Hello!! I'm also a VI just like that 2... If i'm still a Senior, I don't mind the rudeness. However, it's different now.. I'm no longer your schoolmate or friend. I'm your Ma'am... Even up to now, cadets still scold me , calling me by names. Do i even deserve all this shit?? I don't think so... Why is it so unfair to me?? Honestly speaking, I can no longer work with you 2... It's not that I don't like the 2 of you... It's just that you 2 are more experienced than I am. Whenever I worked with you 2, I felt like as if I'm a useless fag in Red Cross.. Not only this, you always asked not to do this at the very last minute, however, you yourself does it... What gave you the privilege to send Training Plan so late or rather so last minute?? Though I'm inexperienced but I swear I can do better than you.. However, I'm not up to the standard to do all these... Know what?? Whenever I stepped into AES for training, I did nothing.. Why?? It's not because I didn't plan. It's because you 2 always outshine me. Whatever thing that came to my mind, you 2 will always beat me in terms of doing out a weekly plan. I don't mind who doing training plan... Seriously.. What I really mind is you 2 plan among yourself... Did you spare a thought for me?? Sometimes I tell myself that maybe i should really leave... So many VIs for what?? 2 is enough in a unit because the third 1 will always have nothing to do.. In the end, the third one doing nothing is me, BENXIAOJIE.. I don't like it... No matter what , I always tell myself that I'm never a loser until I quit trying. So what if the 2 are here, I believe I will be able to outshine them one day. What I need the most now is to clear my ITP, pick up more skills, confidence, faith and hope. With these, I will be able to run AESRCY well. I didn't know you followed me on Twitter... To be honest, most of my tweets are tweeting about RC and VIs... So what?? You saw everything I posted... Anyway, I'm prepared for the worst.. |
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